Are we failing at our RV life mission?

On February 22, we hit a major milestone in our life as full-time RVers: Our travelversary, aka nomadversary. We had officially marked two years of being on the road. If you feel like we celebrate a lot of anniversaries, it's because we do! December 30 is our official "RVersary," the day that we closed on our house and marched into the world of tiny living. But, because we stayed stationary for almost two months, we love to commemorate the day we finally set out on this grand adventure. Plus, 2/22/22 is an awesome date, and it wasn't even planned that way! We just found a window of opportunity between snowstorms and RV repairs...well, you know the story.

Before we launched, we envisioned what we wanted life to be like on the road. Back at our house, we were feeling stifled. We wanted more adventure, more memories, and more life lessons. We wanted to grow as people, spouses, and pet parents. Our goals ran pretty deep, actually, as we saw RV life as a way to refocus our priorities. Already, we had made some big leaps in de-prioritizing "things." On New Year's 2020, we made a few resolutions, one of which being to make a foray into a minimalistic lifestyle. Nothing too crazy, but becoming more aware of what items in our life actually brought us joy and function. Then, when we ordered our RV and got the house ready to sell, we began decluttering and downsizing. What was missing was the alternative priority to things: Experiences. We always loved our experiences. That's why we took so many trips before we even thought about purchasing an RV. Even in the middle of the pandemic, we somehow managed to complete every hike in this book – an even tougher feat given that Massachusetts closed down a lot of the trails. But still, we were tiring of our local excursions and wanted to see what the rest of the country has to offer.

We realized that we were putting a lot of weight on this big shift into RV life, but we thought it was manageable. And so, as we created our website, we wrote down our mission for our travels. Honestly, after that, we hardly ever read it again, except for the couple of times we updated our website. So now, officially into our third year of true nomadism, we revisited our mission to see how we've been doing.

You can read our full Mission Page at this link.

I (Nicole) read the mission and wrote my responses separately from Anthony. Then I asked him for his. Here's what we each said.

Live Simply

Maintaining a minimalist mindset, where what we buy serves a purpose and/or brings us joy

Nicole's response: Most people probably think that minimalism is a given when living in 250sqft of space, but you'd be surprised how much stuff can accumulate in a small space! That said, I think we've kept with this mission pretty well. Not only did we successfully downsize to create more than enough space when we launched, we've actually continued downsizing, getting rid of quite a bit more stuff in the past year. We still buy things for fun, but they serve a purpose in our RV lives. I don't need my floaty or my tent, but they bring me so much happiness and have been the sources of some of the most peaceful retreats of my life. With some exceptions, we try to abide by the "one in, one out" strategy, where if we are buying something that's not directly improving our RV living situation, it's typically a replacement for something that has gotten old, broken, or worn. Funnily enough, the things we tend to go overboard on are food. We always end up buying more food at the grocery store than we plan! At least those are perishable and we do "use" them.

Anthony's response: I feel like we were already making good progress on this before we sold the house, but we're still getting better. Over time, I care less and less about the things I have, except from a functional point of view. I used to very much be a hoarder, keeping things for what I thought were sentimental reasons, but then I'd completely forget I even had them. Nicole and I had many times in the house where she would want to clean out storage areas and we would argue over whether I could keep the most insignificant items, like a rubber band slingshot. Now, I can't remember the last time I resisted getting rid of something that I had forgotten about or hadn't used. When I find something online that interests me, I now set it aside and think about whether or not I actually want it or if it would be of use. Back in the day, I would just buy it. Traveling has shown me the importance of what we do and where we are, which makes "stuff" seem less significant.

Explore with purpose

Staying curious, slowing down, and soaking in all of the new territory

Nicole's response: It's pretty amazing to think about how much we've upped our outdoor time since we launched. We utilize the outdoors for staying active, relaxing, and learning about our surroundings. Sometimes we're really good at slowing down and being mindful, but other times we just love a good, brisk stroll or hike. I'd say we could probably do a bit better at truly noticing the beauty around us with all five senses, especially in the less obvious places. It's rare that we just sit in our campsite and bask in the stillness, though I did get in the habit of doing outdoor yoga and meditation when we were at Lake Mead. That was fantastic. We've done better when exploring epic landmarks, actually, like the Grand Canyon. I soaked in that place to my very core, and I remember not just how it looked and sounded, but even how it smelled and felt. I'm really glad to be able to commit all those senses to memory.

Anthony's response: In one sense, it seems like RV life guarantees a slower, more mindful life, but I need to remind myself that this isn't actually the case. We hear stories of many full-timers who start off in "vacation mode," moving really quickly in order to see all the places they want. We never really did this. Sometimes we move a little faster than we want, but for the most part, we have gone at our desired pace, diving into activities when we want, but other times taking things slow. We always credit our jobs for this because we spend lots of days staying at our campsite working. We have always had a clear demarcation between work and play. I've noticed that our adventures have seasons. We will arrive to a place that we've wanted to travel forever, and we set aside time to do everything we want. Then in other places, we just want a peaceful, quiet campsite so we can do work and chores. In our first year of travel, we mostly stayed near civilization, which felt like a crutch because I could always turn to something to occupy my time. Once we went out west last year, we stayed further from civilization a lot, and that's when I really started feeling comfortable just "being."

Connect with nature

Nicole's response: Not much more to say than I already have, except that connecting with nature has gone beyond our outdoor time. We set up our rig to have a seamless integration with indoors and outdoors, especially when we put down our patio. We have lots of windows, and inside, we have decorated with outdoor elements like leaves and art from our travels. It helps us to always feel connected to nature, even when we're hunkered down inside.

Anthony's response: The amount of nature we've experienced has been overwhelming. From day to day and week to week, we can be in a different climate and ecosystem, with different plants and animals. This makes paying attention a lot more rewarding, and therefore in some ways, easier. One example is hearing the calls of the Eurasian collared dove, which we have heard in so many campsites, and being from the Northeast, we had no clue how prevalent they were in literally every other part of the US. Most other people probably don't even notice them anymore, but for us, their calls are a sign that we're far from home. We associate them with our RV life and probably always will. Constant immersion in nature has also left me a bit spoiled. We can wake up in the morning, open our window shade, and have the most incredible view. Sometimes it is a local lake or forest, and sometimes it's a world-class landmark that my past self would have been lucky just seeing for a couple of days. Now these places have become my backyard, sometimes for weeks at a time.

Be cozy

Nicole's response: People might think that being cozy is a given when you live in such a small space, but in reality, things get cluttered very fast. Our rig is definitely cozy, and much of that has to do with the way we decorated it to bring the outdoor elements in, but when we're living life, stuff starts to pile up, and it stops feeling cozy very quickly! That's just life, though. Sometimes we get busy and let things slide, and then we realize that we need to spend some time putting everything back in its place. It's usually a quick fix, and then we can revel in the coziness again. The best part, though, is no matter how "lived in" our rig gets, I wake up every morning and open my bedside window, often to a different view than the day before. Sometimes the views are extraordinary, vast, and natural. Other times they are of our happy neighbors enjoying a camping retreat. Either way, my morning views always make me feel extra cozy.

Anthony's response: Decorating and layout have always been more Nicole's department than mine, but I think she has done an incredible job. In that sense, just aesthetically, the rig itself is cozy. Beyond that, because it's small compared to a house, there is less mental overhead. We can more easily keep track of what we have, where things are, and what needs to be done. This helps me feel more settled in my space. Most importantly, I'm spending more time with Nicole and my pets, instead of commuting an hour and a half into Boston for an 8-hour workday. Everything I care about is right here, existing in this little space that has brought us a lot of peace and a lot of adventure.

Learn & grow

Nicole's response: Anthony and I are sponges. We love educating ourselves wherever we go. The real lessons, though, come from the hardships of this life. We've gotten ourselves into some fairly traumatic situations, like bottoming out in a ditch, getting caught in a dust storm, and getting stuck in soft ground during a flood. These are really terrible experiences when they're happening, but we always come out on the other side stronger and wiser. Looking back to when we first launched, we might as well be totally different people, we have learned so much. And there is still plenty more to learn. Speaking more on the side of intrinsic growth, a big part of my life is learning about myself and how I operate. I am a big proponent of meditation, self-reflection, talk therapy, and constantly educating myself through books and courses. I've noticed that RV life gives me space to grow in this way, too. I feel a lot less burnt out than I did years ago, and so I have energy to spare on helping myself reach my potential.

Anthony's response: Living on the road, like when we used to take road trips, give us tons of opportunities for experiential learning. It's completely different, because even if we were taught these things in school, we have something more tangible to hold onto and to solidify our understanding. (Also, it's crazy how many things we didn't learn in school that we probably should have)! I'm still just as geographically challenged as ever, but my sense of how everything fits together - history, nature, etc. - is much deeper now. There is also the practical side, learning handy skills and being self-reliant. We often only have one of each component on our rig, and if that component breaks, we often can't get to a shop easily, so it falls on us to fix things as best we can. Nicole can testify that, when we first met, I was not someone people would consider "handy." If something broke, I would put off trying to fix it because I'd need to do tons of research, even if it was a simple fix. Now, I'm much more confident in taking the basic knowledge I have and just trying things to see what works. It's a total increase in self-efficacy, and it's made me feel much safer in our travels, because I now trust myself that small repairs won't be the end of the road.

Uplift the spirit

Use this life to allow more focus on our wellbeing and mental health

Nicole's response: This life certainly isn't for everyone, but I think I speak for both of us when I say, we have had a definitive improvement in our wellbeing since we hit the road. We have let go of a lot of the stresses that were causing us problems back in MA, and we've made room to focus on what we desire most out of life. I already talked about creating more space for my self-growth, which has been tremendous. Mental health challenges are ongoing, and sure, sometimes we have a bad day and think how much easier things would be if we were just settled in a house somewhere, but most days, this life works wonders for our spirits. Every day I wake up grateful that we took this leap. I honestly don't know where my mental state would be today if we hadn't.

Anthony's response: The first part of this has been about exploring, and the constant flow of newness. It's almost impossible to get into a rut the way I could when we were stationary. There's an urgency to seize local opportunities before we move to the next place. The other part brings in the lessons in minimalism. Having less stuff creates more mental space, and I'm the type of person who gets bogged down with my own thoughts a lot. I would often put things off or ignore them instead of facing them head-on, because I'd get too caught up in whatever was spinning in my head. The most obvious example of this was finding a new job. I had known that I had maxed out my time and growth at my current company, but back in MA, I only had the energy and bandwidth to make a few futile, half-attempts to find other jobs. Hitting the road gave me more opportunities to reflect on what I wanted, and more time each week to prioritize the search. To me it's not a coincidence that I got a new job only 3 months after we launched, after searching for over 5 years. And this is with the added constraint of the job needing to allow 100% remote work! Now that I'm in a position that I enjoy and where I feel appreciated, I'm not as weighed down by the day-to-day, which therefore makes even more space for me to seek out opportunities for my health and wellbeing. It's a virtuous cycle!

Pay it forward

Extending kindness, seeing (and respecting) how others live, volunteering, and offering what we can to make this world better

Nicole's response: Okay, the volunteering thing has not happened, at least not in an organized sense. I have offered to play music for campground gatherings, does that count?! That said, we've done pretty well with all the rest. Road tripping is the absolute best way to get immersed in different cultures and see how others live. We have definitely seen some things that are jarring and upsetting (unregulated pet stores in Kentucky come to mind), but more times than not, we find common ground with all the locals, wherever we go. So many full-timers say this, but it's true: We are not as divided as the media portrays. Despite not partaking in any organized volunteer opportunities (yet), we do make sure to lend a helping hand when we have the chance, even if it's something simple like helping a lady reach something on the top shelf at the store (Anthony), or rescuing dogs that have gotten loose and returning them to their owners (me, about 100 times). As for making the world better, we play our part in keeping the Earth clean/leaving no trace, picking up litter when we see it, and staying as environmentally friendly as possible on the road. If we can do that and bring smiles to people's faces through a wave hello or a short conversation, I'd say we're on the right track.

Anthony's response: Well, we haven't volunteered..........but I've become a lot less snobby! Full stop.

...No, really. This life forces you to immerse yourself in a wide range of places and cultures, and to really think about how many different ways there are to live. I always joke with Nicole, saying "If I told past Anthony that one day he'd be living in a trailer..." and this joke seems to expand every time I hit a milestone. "If past Anthony knew I'd be celebrating Christmas living in a trailer in my in-laws' front yard..." "If past Anthony knew I'd be celebrating my 37th birthday living in a trailer in rural Mississippi...." Past Anthony had very rigid conceptions about what a successful, meaningful life looks like. I've seen the shift when looking at our own life, but also when getting a glimpse into others'. We have met RVers who travel much differently than we do. We have met people who live completely differently in their homes, along every point on the economical, political, cultural, and religious spectrum. People in the RV community advise to "camp your own camp," but even just needing to confront this in the first place, recognizing that our way isn't the best way universally, is really important. Everyone has a right to choose how they want to approach their lives. With that, it's okay to be strategic in going after what makes you happy, while ignoring the signifiers that society imposes upon you. This respect has positively changed my perspectives and the way I relate to others, but I haven't yet applied it to the community. Perhaps this will be the next step.

In conclusion...

It's really easy to lose sight of what's important, and for us, RV life has been the key to not letting this happen. When we break it all down, we really have made so many positive strides in our own growth, our knowledge, and our perceptions of society. We have also maintained many values that have always been important to us, like having a work-life balance and focusing on our mental and physical health. We've kept with our mission really well, but there are still tons of opportunities to pursue it even further. That's if we remember to actually read our mission once in a while!

A pleasant surprise for us, though, was that we really nailed our mission when we created it. We wrote it before we even set foot in our RV, and seeing how clearly we envisioned this life is pretty remarkable. Even now, years later, we have the exact same mission and feel no need to change it or update it. We had a sense of what RV life could bring to us, and we were right on the money. When we think back to how many people were wary about our choice, hoping we've "thought it through," this mission really shows that we did. And the fact that we're achieving so much within that mission, makes this RV life even sweeter.